History, [Her]story

I am not a very religious person. I never grew up with the church, never sang hymns on Sunday morning, never said prayers at night. Nor am I the most political, flag waving, foot stomping, change-making kind. You may think then, that I've had little to hold on to, little to stand for, to turn to in times of trouble during these near three decades that I've lived, but you'd be wrong. What I've always believed in is love.

It's become clear to me during the past 10 months that we've been sawing, nailing, glueing, and caulking (and I know I said I don't usually pray, but when you've spent a few hours making a window frame and then need to fit the existing window in it, you've got to do a little praying that it will fit!), that our house has experienced so much love during the past 100 years. Honestly, even without the insulation and sheetrock, the house is so warm, so inviting. It's like a cocoon (the natural kind, not the creepy 80's movie).

This became even more clear yesterday. Now, I wasn't lucky enough to be there when they stopped by because I was working, but Judy, the woman who grew up in this house, stopped by yesterday with her three sisters, and according to my mother (whose opinion I hold highly), these women were the closest family she had ever seen. Judy grew up in this house with her 7 siblings (4 boys, 4 girls) and the many other children throughout the years that her parents fostered. Judy has told me time and again just how much her parents loved children, and other neighbors have told us stories too. When we had some dead branches off trimmed off our large trees last year, Jimmy aka "Tree Man" told us about growing up in the neighborhood and remembering Judy's father who once brought Jimmy and his brother bikes when his own parents couldn't afford to.

The fabulous Raymers. Thanks, Judy for all the loving memories you've shared and of course, the most wonderful bread I have ever eaten!

I just love hearing the stories about our house's history, especially Judy's memories of her childhood, like how she and her siblings used to save their lunch money under the loose floor boards upstairs or how when Wendy eloped with the boy across the street, the sisters threw her shoes from the upstairs window as she was driving off.

It's all kinds of love that shapes our lives. It's love for our (sometimes literal) neighbors, our friends, and that deeply woven, uncompromising love for our families - And I'm thrilled to know that our house has seen them all.

Deck the [House]

Once you start a house project, it's quite easy to forget what your life was like before. I wrote music? WHAT?! I read books?! Maybe it sounds pathetic and maybe it is, but when you've got a list of home things to do that if actually written down could quite possibly squash you, the need to stay busy becomes an addiction. When I'm not forced to be at the house, it's still on the forefront of my mind - paint colors, wood floors, lighting, wallpaper. I've done so many google searches on wallpaper alone, that my mind has more than once gone into a sort of system failure where everything becomes so characteristically different and yet potentially the same - not unlike the blue/black, white/gold dress situation. Is the wallpaper purple and metallic? Wait, no that's gray/silver. Wait...

Unfortunately, it's hard to stay busy during the mechanical when you're not Dad. So this week, when a I had a number of consecutive days of work and both of the parents were out of town, Todd and I decided to test our building knowledge and take on a short project of our own - the back deck!

Our current back deck at the time was a smallish, square structure that we were planning to expand on at some point down the road, but hey, no time like the present right?

Here's the deck before. It wasn't terrible, but not exactly the best deck for entertaining and enjoying the summer.

Mom gave us the idea to move the stairs, so we started by removing those to allow for better "flow." Thanks to a little phone guidance from Dad, we were able to draw out and measure our plans before setting the posts that first afternoon.

We had a successful first day setting the posts, and when we came back the next day, we set straight out attaching and leveling the outer rim of 2x8's. At some point in, Todd asked, "Should we measure again just to make sure it's square?" to which I responded, "Nah. Looks great to me!" We proceeded to attached the remaining 2x8's to the outside, and then I began measuring the 16 inch centers for the inter support 2x8's.

Only the measurements didn't match up...exactly. One side? Four inches longer than the other side. I remeasured both to make sure. How could it be? We measured the diagonals before we left last night, I thought. So I measured the shorter sides. Two inches off. If that deck was square, I was drunk.

You know those oh-shit moments? Yeah, that was one of those.

So we weighed our solutions. Move the posts? We'd spend all day just getting back to the start and by that time, Mom and Dad would be back and we'd be back to the inside. Lay the decking diagonally? Not a bad option, but we'd use way more deck boards that we planned and we'd spend more time getting the cuts perfect. We even considered leaving it as it was, but the longer I knew it wasn't square, the more and more I begin to think it looked rather like a kidney bean.

So we employed a couple two by fours and a number of notching techniques to push and pull the sides until we had that thing pretty close to perfect. I say this like it was easy, but it took a good 8 hours and a small pizza to get the thing just to the point where we could begin the 2x8s once more.

Todd notching one of the posts during our tedious correction process.

More notching. Five out of the six beams required some adjusting to get the deck sides square.

BUT we made it through. And you know what? Despite the urge to point fingers (YOU put that post there, YOU took that faulty measurement), we found a solid solution without killing each other in the process. It's a tiny step, I know, but I can't help but to feel a little proud, especially in these months before our marriage.

I mean, hell, if we can make a kidney bean shaped deck and then turn it into a decent rectangle in three days, I doubt a little tiff over loading the dishwasher will be the end of us.